although i'm physically back home. my soul still seems to be roaming in taiwan. i love that place. i envy all those that are going in one months time or tomorrow. even though i've been there once,i will still want to get back there again. totally loved taiwan. totally loved my stay there. in this whole paragraph of what i feel, you can count the amount of times i wrote "loved", it completely shows my affection toward this beautiful and amazing country.
这样的记忆让我在三回味。。
The whole plantation of lavander.
i reminisced the times we spent in the plantation as if i could still smell the aroma of those flowers lingering in the air. so carefree, so relaxed, the mind is calm, you feel the wind, you close your eyes and enjoy the moment. you leave behind all your troubles, your worries, your past, and yourself.. embranced the silence, embranced mother nature...
心情是如此的平静。。
忘掉了所有的烦恼，
忘了所有的悲伤，
忘掉那不开心的过去，
也忘了我自己。。
真希望能永远无忧无虑的生活着。。。
this is a cafe located at ximending. we were mesmorised by the whole atompshere of the cafe till we had the urge to go in, have a sip of coffee and a slice of cake and just to relax after a long day.
美得像一幅画。。
如果能在这里喝一杯香浓的咖啡。。
是一件幸福的事。。。
why am i blogging in chinese?? you might be wondering..
cause i read Ji Mi's books again..
and besides that. this post is abt taiwan..
writting it in chinese.. 比较有感觉。。
anyway.. after coming back from taiwan.. been busy with driving and emperor's rehearsals and pasar theatre's stuff.. theres quite alot of things to handle for both productions.
but in between i still enjoy myself. going out with the hkhk outting gang.. for movie, for k-ing.
met up with fated.
driving is getting a little more exciting as i starts to drive in the night. more cars, so have to move faster.Accerlerate. I tried u-turning. :))
what about braces? my surgery?
its settled. the date is fixed. and it screwed my plan..
i wanted to have my surgery on the 27may so at least i can handle the pasar theatre's production before having the long break.
but i did not expect that my surgeon would carry forward my operation date to 20th may. which means i have to forgo the pasar theatre's production. F**K. yes. i am pissed, because i've told Dr Poon that i wanted it to be on the 27th of may weeks ago, yet due to some communication breakdown, the message wasn't passed to Dr Goh. I went to the dentist on tuesday to know that i got to be admitted to the hopsital on 19th may. i need to go through all sorts of pre-operation checkup and i need to donate 2 units of my own blood to myself. I was also told the process of my surgery and the after effect of it. i was alone.
Huang Lao Shi asked me today. if i'm scared. 怕？你会怕吗？of course i will.. its afterall an operation. i'm scared. i'm afraid of the uncertainty. i'm afraid of what i'll be like or look like in the end. I dont really like major changes. only if im comfortable with it. but this uncertainty makes me very uncomfortable. i'm afraid people might not know or recognised me. i'm scared of the pain. i'm scared of the whole post-operation feeling.what if i turn to be depressed?? but.. so what if i'm scared? i still have to go for it.都已经走到这里了，不能回头了。。 it was never for looks.it was for my bitting. for my eating.. for my digestion... i cant live my life without chewing food. i'm not that brave. but i choose to be brave for once. i choose to be on my own.
我还是偶尔会想起你。hoping.wondering. imagining that you are here.
that we are still on talking terms, that we are still like how we used to be.
只是偶尔。。
not that often anymore..
after knowing that you actually go to the extend of ignoring my presence.
cutting all connections with me other than fb.
ha. what can i do?
nothing.
i've picked myself up. FATED! you too..人生短短几十年。不好的，不快乐的，就忘了吧！we shall all be happy together??!
inferior,自卑。。
i'm feeling that when i see everyone being accepted in uni.. when i see everyone around me, smart and "attractive".. when you find yourself, below average..........
我又累了。。。
